Profound and not so profound announcements I wish I could make.Tumblr (3.0; @gawms)http://gawms.tumblr.com/<p>In addition to the posted prices, if you want to purchase any Sons of Anarchy merchandise, you will have to submit to outside authority.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29459100066http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29459100066Wed, 15 Aug 2012 00:03:00 -0400gawmsjokeanarchysons of anarchyeucrustes<p>Just a reminder, we now sell Che Guevara t-shirts.  On a related note, we slashed our employee wages again.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29229774997http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29229774997Sat, 11 Aug 2012 20:58:00 -0400gawmsjokecommunismguevarache guevaraeucrustes<p>Beware the Slender Man, he stalks the aisles.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29172731242http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29172731242Fri, 10 Aug 2012 23:59:05 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:slenderjokethat game is scary as helleucrustes<p>Now selling college degrees.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29135160506http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29135160506Fri, 10 Aug 2012 14:07:24 -0400gawmscollegejokeeucrustes<p><span>Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.  Have a nice day!</span></p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29082147490http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/29082147490Thu, 09 Aug 2012 18:56:21 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:cthulhujokelovecraftH P Lovecrafteucrustes<p>If you&#8217;re experiencing difficulties, please wait until the Singularity.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28937640207http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28937640207Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:47:45 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:gawmsSingularitytranshumanismjokeeucrustes<p>Bob just accidently released 200 anthrax-laced rats from the pet department.  Good going Bob.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28925287262http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28925287262Tue, 07 Aug 2012 15:42:47 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:gawmsjokepetsratseucrustes<p>If you are experiencing ennui, our employees cannot help you deal with it.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28886298883http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28886298883Tue, 07 Aug 2012 00:00:46 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:gawmsphilosophyjokeboredomeucrustes<p>All of our Harry Potter themed items are in aisle 9 and three-quarters.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28885249728http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28885249728Mon, 06 Aug 2012 23:44:15 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:gawmsHarry Potterjokeeucrustes<p>Scientists just dropped the most advanced rover ever on Mars.  Think about that while you buy half a dozen cans of cheez-whiz.  Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28847754745http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/28847754745Mon, 06 Aug 2012 14:19:00 -0400jokeGood afternoon Wal-Mart customers:Marscuriosityeucrustes<p>The end is nigh. Paper bags are in aisle 6, alchohol is in aisle 11. Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20451721259http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20451721259Wed, 04 Apr 2012 00:15:00 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:ialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva<p>God is dead. But, then again, so is Nietzsche. Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450518632http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450518632Tue, 03 Apr 2012 23:49:00 -0400Good afternoon Wal-Mart customers:ialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva<p>Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. He’s probably naked. Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450377188http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450377188Tue, 03 Apr 2012 23:46:43 -0400Good Afternoon Wal-Mart Customersialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva<p>We sell guns here. Guns from Wal-Mart. Just saying.</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450325028http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450325028Tue, 03 Apr 2012 23:45:38 -0400Good Afternoon Wal-Mart Customersialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva<p>NO, you cannot “surf” the bouncy ball rack. Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450311573http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450311573Tue, 03 Apr 2012 23:45:21 -0400Good Afternoon Wal-Mart Customersialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva<p>The world is flat, and borne on the backs of giant animals. Have a nice day!</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450296429http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450296429Tue, 03 Apr 2012 23:45:03 -0400Good Afternoon Wal-Mart Customersialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva<p>Now selling machetes and baseballs. Just saying.</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450272674http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450272674Tue, 03 Apr 2012 23:44:34 -0400Good Afternoon Wal-Mart Customersialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva<p>Would an Osama Bin-Laden please report to the sporting section? No? Damn.</p>http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450228310http://gawms.tumblr.com/post/20450228310Tue, 03 Apr 2012 23:43:40 -0400Good Afternoon Wal-Mart Customersialwayswantedtobelieve-deactiva